March 2005 Archives

man, it sucks that your thesis is due next week and you don't have enough inspiration to write ...

man, it sucks that before the thesis is due, there are other stuff due ...

man, it sucks even more that even after the thesis is due, there are other stuff due immediately and there's hardly any time to do them ...

man, it sucks big time, that because the thesis is due next week, and time is running short, there is no time to spend on the other stuff that is due before or after the thesis, simply because the thesis takes priority ...

man, it sucks!

hello there "dg", it's been quite a long while since we last caught up with each other.

in fact, i'm not even sure if you know my blog exists.

nevertheless, i just wanted to try this out (since emails and instant messaging have been to no avail), and pray hard that some way or another, you will be able to read this message specially meant for you ...

throughout the past 4 years, i've always been wondering why a special friendship like ours (or at least what i thought was one) collapsed into the state it is today. i can't help wondering what happened to cause such a result, and i've been second-guessing and third-guessing (if there's such a word) what i did wrong, or what i did, or why it just happened, and after 4 years, i still don't know ...

and it bugs me that i don't know, and it bugs me that when i ask, i get no response ... because our friendship was (and still is) very special to me, and 4 years later, i'm still running through the memories from the distant past when you were still around, trying to see "if i had done something some other way, would it have made a difference?"

but the fact remains, i'm still clueless ...

hence the net plea, to hopfully gain understanding, from you, from anyone who can possibly shed light on this matter ... because after 4 years of regretting the loss of a friendship like yours, i really need to know why ...

if the fault was mine, i just want to extend my humblest apologies ... even if our friendship cannot be rebuilt, at least, please let me know why ...

i'm sorry that the friendship that i thought would last a lifetime, even after we've both got our own families, was too fragile even to last 2 full years ... and this has really become one of the greatest regrets in my life :(

"dg", i'd really like to hear from you again and most of all, i'd really like to be friends again.

The title of this post says it all! :)

But seriously, blogging is addictive ... there's some magic behind typing behind a screen, words to share with the world, vaguely reminding me of 2 things:

(1) the "Hello World!" greeting that most programmers place in their very first program

(2) [and perhaps something closer to my heart] the You've got Mail show with Meg Ryan eagerly anticipating mail under her "shopgirl" identity ... alrite, this is not email per se, but nevertheless, it's always exciting to see who will respond to my blog entries or tag on my tag board ... and though my readership is still minimal, hopefully i will be able to use this blog to keep in touch with my friends who are all over the globe studying ...

p/s: anyone knows how to prevent people from spamming in the comments function?

I would so love to re-include the comments function back after every blog post but because of the last episode of spam there, i'm rather concerned about the spam ruining the entire blog .... any suggestions?

well, it's official, i've FINALLY started writing my thesis ... but this time it's not a writer's block problem that's in the way, it's more of a "where can i find more info" problem ... *sigh*

and i also have a presentation due 2 days after the thesis is due ... and though i love the module, and though my project grp mates and i have been slogging at it every week, somehow, our presentation prep seems to be lengthening and never-ending =p

now, considering that we started at least 5 weeks in advance so that we could try and finish it earlier, avoiding similar deadlines around the same period, it looks like it just ain't coming true =( but at least, we've given our best shot and MORE! so hopefully, by God's grace, we'll come out okay at the end ... for now, let's just keep working at the presentation ... jia you, jia you, jia you!

COUNTDOWN:
to the BIG T: 11 days
to the FIRST big E: 35 days
to the SECOND big E: 45 days
to FREEDOM: 46 days (hurrah! it's sub-50 now!)

7 OBSTACLES BEFORE RELIEF (in chrono order):
Big T
Presentation & Assign 6
Assign 7
Term Paper
Big E1
Big E2

everyone, please pray for me, it's the toughest sem i've ever been thru, for some reason or other ... thanks!

As I sit on my unwritten thesis
And watch my blog disintegrate
Under the attack of spam
I can't help but place my fingers
On the keyboard
Just to write
A word, a line, anything
That will restore my blog
To the less unglorious state
That it once was